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Bad Day of Golf
A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally the doctor asks him what happened.
Well, it was like this, said the man. I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows.
We went to look for it, and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball ... stuck right in the middle of the cow's arse. That's when I made my big mistake.
"What did you do?" the doctor enquired.
Well, I lifted the tail and called to my wife, "Hey, this looks like yours!".